NancyB
Joined: 29 Aug 2006
Posts: 2
Location: upstate
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 Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 11:12 am Post subject: Needs work but it has promise. |
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Dear Beesonman,
I viewed your Leica on youtube. You say you're a high school student? Nice work in parts, certainly a cut above most high school projects but the film is very long. How many months do you have to produce this project? What medium are you using and do you want full animation or more Flash-y work (which would make it possible to finish the film in a reasonable amount of time.)?
Regardless of medium, the action is not reading well.
You have some drawing skill, but your cinematography needs work. Screen directions are unclear and there are occasions where you can't tell where characters are coming from or where they are going. I can't tell them apart at the beginning, either. You might try shading the aliens on all drawings so that they read differently from the explorer (I presume that is what he is.)
The clearest part of your film starts with the squid monster sequence. I recommend cutting the entire first third of the film and speeding up the timing on the remainder by a factor of two. It's good that you chose to edit to Holst's URANUS section of THE PLANETS, but you really should edit the music and then time animation to it, not try to ianimate to the entire piece. You need to have a better idea of where characters are: draw a floor plan so that your shots cut better.
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Don't take life seriously. It ain't nohow permanent. (Walt Kelly, POGO) |
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